For Adoro

Can I be St. Joan of Arc?

Can you make sure the Dominicans in their black-and-white habits are prolific throughout, and make sure the evil governments that were the ones actually killing people look as nasty as they actually were? Can I be "burned at the stake" as long as it authentically reveals who was in charge of the burning?

You might want to have a guitilline in order to show the butchery of the State and the Mercy of the Inquisitors who saved so many from the fanaticism of the State....

Ooohhhhh.....Dominicans in black and white? Perfect! Those are my colors after all! For that suggestion, Adoro, you can most definitely be St. Joan of Arc.

Since you asked, the short version of the story is that my family is a version of protestant that buys into all the myths about Catholicism. I occasionally get tired of their remarks and start making jokes to keep myself sane.

Currently there's some discontent in the family about the fact that I'm planning a Catholic wedding. I've told my mother that unless she tells her family to back off, that I'm going to plan the most over-the-top Catholic wedding--one that buys into all of the stereotypes.

We're planning the wedding for the fall of next year, right around Halloween. The idea of a Halloween themed reception quickly morphed into an Inquisition themed reception.

My grandmother informed Adam that she will not be attending the wedding because she can't be part of a ceremony for two people who've left The Lord's ChurchTM to join a "Man Made Religion."

Inquisition Themed Wedding Reception

So, the Clam posted on her site that she'd like to see my inquisition themed wedding reception actually happen. I hate to disappoint her, but I doubt it will ever really happen.

It is fun (in a twisted way) to think of my anti-Catholic family's reaction to an inquisition themed wedding reception. So, in an ideal world where I could actually do this, how would I do it?

I'm thinking I'll need Fr. Schnippel's help. Wonder if he'd like to play the part of Torquemada?

Since you so want to see it happen, Clam, perhaps we could make you an honorary torturer or witch burner?

What other ideas do y'all have?

Six Quirks

1. Link the person(s) who tagged you.
2. Mention the rules on your blog.
3. Tell about 6 unspectacular quirks of yours.
4. Tag 6 fellow bloggers by linking them.
5. Leave a comment on each of the tagged blogger’s blogs letting them know they’ve been tagged.

I was tagged for my first ever meme by Jeff

1. I absolutely loathe Walmart. I will do anything in my power to avoid entering the store

2. I have to "face" all the money in my wallet. All the bills have to be arranged in order of denomination and the bills must all be facing the same direction.

3. I would rather clean the bathroom than do dishes.

4. I cannot stand Dickens and I secretly look down upon those who do like his work :-)

5. I will remake my bed until the hospital corners are crisp and there are as few wrinkles as possible in the sheets and blankets.

6. I have to sleep with one foot not under the covers. My mother tells me I've done this since I was a baby.

I tag Clam, Fr. S, Stephanie, Erik, Cheryl and Joseph the Worker

August Is Pray for PZ Myers Month

See the St. Peter Canisius Apostolate site.

For the love of all that is good and Holy....

....someone please put me out of my misery now!

Hallelujah! I have discovered the greatness that is Flannery O'Connor!

I cannot believe that I have survived this long without discovering her work. It's amazing.

I was having a very unproductive library trip last week, so I decided to peruse the classics section because I can always find something there.

Nothing really struck my fancy though so I decided to grab Mansfield Park and an anthology of Flannery O'Connor works.

I am in love with her writing. It's so rich and the imagery is amazing. I can almost visualize the scenes as I'm reading.

Sigh, too bad I'm sitting through the most mind-numbingly dull class that ever existed right now. I thought CivPro was bad, but this is much, must worse.

I'm going to start banging my head against the desk until sweet oblivion arrives.

The Bank of Life

Life, whether social or business, is a bank in which you deposit certain funds of character, intellect and heart; or other funds of egotism, hard-heartedness and unconcern; or deposit--nothing! An the bank honors your deposit, and no more. In other words, you can draw nothing out but what you have put in.

If your community is to give you admiration and honor, it is merely necessary to be admirable and honorable. The more you put in, the more will be paid out to you.

Emily Post (1922) Etiquette in Society, in Business, in Politics and at Home

This Blog is under the patronage of Our Lady of LaSalette

Fifteen year old Melanie and eleven year old Maximin were out tending their cows. They were simple children. When we say "simple" we don't mean like that magazine or the Amish. We mean 'dim bulbs.' They are simple enough to fall asleep and all lose track of the cows. When they awoke they went
looking for the cows but instead found a big ball of light. A beautiful lady stepped out of it. It was the Virgin Mary.

Unlike other Mary sightings, Mary is wearing an odd costume (not her usual blue), never mentions the rosary and she never stops crying. Mary slumps onto a rock and sobs. She tell the children that Jesus has absolutely had it with cart drivers using his name in vain. She tells the children Jesus is very angry and she can’t hold Him back much longer.

Apparently everyone stopped swearing in La Salette after that, as the town still stands.

Thanks Sister Mary Martha!

Visit Sister's Etsy shop.

To The Impatient Driver Behind Me...

Dear Fellow Motorist,

I just wanted to say good morning to you too! I agree that it's a beautiful summer day.

All pleasantries aside, I did notice that you appeared to have some difficulties with the etiquette of what to do when a traffic light is out. I'm trying my hardest to keep with my self imposed goal of becoming a nice person, so I thought I'd help you out.

When a traffic light is out, you're supposed to treat the intersection as a four way stop. I'm going to assume only the best about you and guess that you don't drive in the area a lot, so you perhaps didn't know that the light from the 275 off ramp onto Beechmont Ave goes out every time there's a storm. I'm also going to assume that perhaps you're a very heavy sleeper and that you didn't catch any of the local news this morning so you wouldn't have heard about the bad thunderstorms last night. That's okay. Now you know.

You should also know that when your fellow drivers are treating said intersection as a four way stop, that laying on your horn when I stopped to allow the cars from the exit ramp to take their turn does not exhibit the best manners. But that's okay too, I'll just assume that perhaps you were busy.

Except you turned to go to Lowe's at the next light, so I'm not sure what was so important at 7:45 this morning that you couldn't stop and wait your turn like everyone else was doing. Now I'm still trying to be a good person, so I didn't say anything or make any gestures in your general direction. I didn't even shoot you a dirty look - instead I said a Hail Mary to myself.

However, I've decided that my desire to be a better person doesn't stop me from wishing bad driving karma on you. So the next time you're stuck at the end of that exit ramp and some yahoo doesn't follow the rules for a malfunctioning traffic light, I hope you enjoy the wait.

Yours truly,
The girl in the grey civic.

"Good News For Catholics"

Do any of my astute readers (all three of you) know anything about an organization called Good News For Catholics? I know they're anti-Catholic but other than that I haven't heard much about them.

The reason I ask is because I found one of their tracts at my grandmother's house over the Fourth of July weekend. I didn't get a good chance to look at it though, but from a quick glance it seems to be the usual "Catholics don't read the Bible so if you encourage them to read the Bible then they'll no longer be Catholic, etc..."

Testing

I just added an application called ScribeFire to Firefox. You might see more entries from me if this works.

Exhausted

I did two shifts in the margarita booth at the festival this weekend. Last night was much busier than Friday night was, but also more fun. Dcn. Dave, Roxanne and I had a fun time. I saw Dcn. Dave after mass this morning, but forgot to ask him if he ever managed to make his "dacquitas" look as pretty as mine did. :)


In other news, I've decided I have a knack for making it rain. After holding off for a few days, I finally dragged the hose out and watered my flowers this afternoon, only to be treated to a thunderstorm a few hours later. Sigh.


I suppose I've procrastinated enough. I need to go study for PR.

CoC Funeral

I went to a church of Christ funeral today. It was really kind of sad. It was just a graveside service--the preacher gave a sermon about how we all needed to come to Jesus before we died and we sang two hymns--Amazing Grace and Revive Us Again.

I have a problem with preachers preaching their funeral sermons about how the good majority of the audience is going to go to hell. At least this preacher didn't condemn people to Hell by name like I've seen done before.

It was strange because most of the people there were from my old congregation. I stood in the back with my other apostate cousins and said the rosary during the main part of the service.

There was something lacking with the whole service. I can't pinpoint exactly what, but it all felt very superficial.

O/T but even with someone musically trained leading the acapella hymns, there is still something to be said for instrumental music. There was one couple there neither of whom could carry a tune in a bucket with a lid on it :)

Bridesmaid Dresses

The style on the left is what I plan to use for my bridesmaids' dresses. I'm thinking I'll do the underdress in a matte black and the over dress in some kind of organza. Then I'll have the bridesmaids wear black elbow gloves.

iPhone Mania

There was a line of people wrapped around the AT&T store on the corner this morning. It took me a minute to realize what was going on--the new iPhone.

I guess having the latest is important to some people.

That's It!

I am utterly frustrated at the thought of finding a wedding gown that is anything even close to modest! There's something wrong with every dress I try on--most notable is the distinct lack of fabric on the upper half. The dress I've liked best so far is a no-go without significant alterations. Unfortunately the vast majority of dresses in the bridal shops are strapless. Now, I'm not a small chested gal by any stretch of the imagination and I'm also short (5'2") so wearing a strapless gown will likely give Father a glimpse of something that neither he nor I would want him to see. Incredibly frustrating!

So I'm opting out. That's right, I refuse to purchase a wedding gown from a bridal shop. I have challenged my mother and she has agreed to put her sewing skills to the test.

Dad has agreed to buy her a nicer sewing machine and I will be purchasing her a dressmaker's dummy.

Check back for updates :)

Behold the Spam of God

Mark Shea has a hilarious post over at Inside Catholic about the messages he's received from "Bible-Believing (TM)" Christians. You should go check it out.

Over the last two years of my Catholic journey, I've come to realize that sometimes you just have to laugh at things because you can't change them.

Wedding Reception Theme?

Ooh, I love it! (Even though it is just a joke.)

Just think: you could have a Catechism contest for who gets to be Torquemada...you and Adam could be Isabella and Ferdinand...your priest could play Pope Sixtus...and depending on what time of year you're getting married, maybe have a bonfire...

Too bad your family isn't Lutheran. You could really have some fun with that...

Kasia, if we didn't live in different states, I think we'd be good friends! :) I had suggested having a rack in the reception hall so I could use it on all the people who complain that a nuptial mass is too long.

My only problem is that I tend to get too Monty Pythonesque when thinking up wicked things to do to my families. You know, things like having the bridesmaids wear black cowls and carry whips or having someone wandering though saying "bring out yer dead!"

I do get a little giggle just thinking of it. Of course my family will already be absolutely scandalized because there will be drinking and dancing.

Sigh. Family.

I got another "you're going to hell because you're Catholic" letter from the CoC side of the family. It's from an aunt that even the other CoCers consider wacky so I'm not too concerned. I look at it this way--there's two less people I can invite to the wedding.

The letter does strengthen my desire to have an over-the-top Catholic wedding though. :)

Luckily, Adam and I can joke about it because we both deal with the same thing from our families. We were joking that we're going to have a Spanish Inquisition themed reception--complete with "indulgences" as drink tickets.

Poor mom thought we were being serious (which we're not really) but I think the humor is the only way we can deal with it sometimes.

Shaving Cats

The big, fluffy cat in the post below got his summer haircut today. Last year he went to the groomer for his lion cut. This year, mom decided we could do it ourselves. I was skeptical, but agreed to go along with it partly because the groomer who did him last year won't take him back.

(In all fairness to her, I don't blame her one bit. The cat weighs 25 pounds and he bites when he's upset. I could take him to the groomer associated with my vet and have him sedated, but that raises the price quite a bit.)

So, mom and I got out the clippers and held the cat down. We got the majority of the long hair off him, but the poor thing looks so stupid right now. I'm sure he'll appreciate it in a few days--once he gets over the humiliation.